Making God our first resort - an experience with Sri Sathya Sai

The first resort - God

We tend to use prayer as a last resort, but I think God wants it to be our first line of defense. To better understand that, we rewind the beautiful story of the sweet relationship between Swami (Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba) and His students right to the very beginning. It was in the late sixties and Swami would spend most of the year at His ashram in Bengaluru (Bangalore then), in Brindavan, Whitefield. The reason for that was obvious - on 9th June 1969, a men's’ college had been started at Brindavan and Swami had decided to spend more than 75 percent of His time with the students in whom He placed His faith for the building of the golden Sai era.

The old Brindavan was a haven of divine proximity for Swami's students. 

Like the spring which is the beginning of every great river, the Sathya Sai educational mission too began in a small and humble manner. The classrooms were small and cramped and the shed beside Swami’s bungalow served as the hostel for the boys. Swami lived so close by that He would often walk into the ‘hostel’ on surprise visits and spend time shaping and chiseling the heart and minds of the boys. On many occasions, He would Himself walk amidst the sleeping boys and wake them up for Suprabhatam (early morning prayers) and guide them in everything - from tending to cows and rolling chapaties in the kitchen to gardening and taking care of the deer in the compound.

The number of boys enrolled was very small but it began to grow soon. Who would not want to live with the Master of masters? The classrooms and hostel became woefully inadequate and Swami decided to get a college building built. Once Swami makes a will, nothing ever changes it. Soon, a magnificent edifice shaped like a gigantic dam, probably symbolic of the potential it held within its walls, came up in months. It was late Col. Joga Rao, an ardent devotee and a retired civil engineer, who supervised the construction.

This is the setting for our current story.

Prayer is NOT a sign of weakness

A little detour from our main story in order to delve on the theme of this essay!

When a patient is in admitted to the hospital, the doctor examines him, finds out the problem, offers a solution and even gives a timeframe for the recovery. But then, things always do not go along the timeline - they go awry. How often have we come across situations where the same doctors raise their hands helplessly and say,
“We have done everything possible. Now its all left to God!”

A wise doctor knows from the beginning that he only gives medicines while it is God who heals. That humility makes him turn to God right in the beginning and he himself functions simply as an instrument. He chooses God as the first resort rather than the last one! While it is easy to understand the doctors’ example in terms of how they turn to God as the last resort, we do not realize that we often commit the same blunder in our lives too.

Whether it is the decision of making a financial investment or choosing a relationship; picking the right career or dealing with an illness we consider it as a sign of strength to march ahead without seeking help. We do this without realizing that when we seek God’s help, we are actually tapping into an infinite resource within ourselves. Prayer is definitely not a sign of weakness. It need not be the last resort. And yet, time and again, we turn to God after every effort made has failed. It is akin to offering the leftovers of a feast to the Lord where the food is comparable to our skills, talents, energies and finances. No wonder then that Swami always has taught us to do Brahmaarpanam (food prayer) before partaking any meal.

Please do not mistake me. I am not in the least suggesting that we do not put in our effort. Rather, the focus is on the attitude behind the effort!

The magnificent, dam-shaped, college building that was constructed to serve the students at Brindavan.

A heartfelt plea from a student

Now I continue where I had left off. Swami got the college building constructed and instructed the same engineer to come up with a proposal for a hostel building also. Col. Joga Rao implicitly obeyed the instructions and drew up all the plans for the construction of the hostel building. The shed in which the boys were staying was too small and right next to it was a huge water tank. The only possible place where the hostel could be constructed was in an empty plot of land adjacent to the new college building. Having made all the plans, he approached Swami and sought a date for the laying of the foundation stone.

The evening before the actual ‘ground-breaking’ ceremony could take place, Swami arrived at the shed where the boys were staying. He informed them about a new hostel coming up with all the comforts and conveniences. There would now be ample space to stay for each student. Even as Swami told all this with sparkling eyes and a heart that rejoiced at the fact that the boys would become comfortable, the boys themselves were downcast - a new hostel near the college building would mean that they would be staying at least 300 meters away from the beloved Swami. That would reduce the frequency of all the sudden Divine visits they now enjoyed.

But what could be done? There was no other space available for construction and the shed was indeed getting crowded. One of the boys promptly wrote a letter to Swami, pouring out his heart. Swami accepted the letter from him and even as He read it, He looked at the boy and asked him,
“Shall I read out this letter to the boys assembled here?”
“Swami it is all your wish.”
And so, Bhagawan read out the letter. The spirit of the letter is outlined below:

Swami, we do not want any new hostel. We can always adjust in this space as long as we are assured of proximity to you. If we go to the new Hostel, we would be far away from Swami’s home. We just do not want to go away from Swami! If Swami is so particular about the new hostel building planned next to the College, then Swami should have a new home constructed right next to the proposed new hostel.

Among the thousands of letters Swami receives, there are a few that have changed the course of 'His'tory! 

Swami looked at the principal, Sri Narendar and asked him what he thought about the letter. He replied that Swami knows the hearts of the boys. They had left their parents and had come only to be with Swami.

A decision was then made on the spot. Swami sent for Col. Joga Rao. He then asked him,
“Joga Rao! The boys want to stay near Swami. They do not want to go away. Can the new hostel be built next to the mandir here?”
“That is impossible Swami! There is a huge ground tank here. How can we build anything here?”

God, though allergic to the word ‘impossible’, merely smiles at those who use it. Swami simply said that a hostel could easily be built in place of the tank that existed there! He then went on to explain to an amazed Joga Rao as to how the construction should proceed.

And today, the hostel stands over the same land where a huge tank existed. And Swami has visited the boys at the Brindavan hostel on a number of times!

With God as the first resort, there is no need to resort to anyone or anything else!

An aerial view of the hostel that stands right next to the darshan hall in Brindavan. The hostel has a huge basement floor, a reminder of the tank on which it has been built. 

Concluding thoughts

Prayer is not something that is to be made only in times of trouble or distress. There is the story of a ship captain who used to pray daily as he steered his ship. Everyone often wondered as to why the captain used to pray so much when the sailing was so smooth. The captain said nothing but continued his practice of regular prayer.

And then, one day, there was a huge storm at sea. So terrifying and deadly it was that everyone on the ship got on their knees to pray. In the middle of all this chaos, the only person not praying was the captain! The surprised passengers on the ship asked him to join them in their prayers. The captain’s reply was,
“This is not my time to pray. I have a job at hand. The prayers I make when the sailing is smooth gives me the strength and mental calm to steer the ship in these times.”

A person who has got the priorities right prays in times of joy, comfort and peace. The prayer then gives the same joy, comfort and peace in troubled times. This is what the message of Kabir Das is when he asks the rhetorical question:

Dukh Mein Sumiran Sab Karein; Sukh Mein Karein Na Koi.
Jo Sukh Mein Sumiran Karein; Dukh Kahe Ko Hoi?

(Everyone thinks of the Lord in difficult times while none think of Him in time of joy. Those that think of Him in times of joy, why will they ever have difficult times?)

Making God the first resort is possible only through humility and surrender. And this is because though things seem to be under our control, in life everything is ultimately in God’s hands. Why don’t we follow what Swami tells us in this most beautiful ‘Prayer of Surrender’? (See video below.)

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The best gift to seek from God

The PC session (as narrated by Sri Ashok Sundaresan - 1st batch MFM 1993-1995)

A picture of a Poornachandra Session in progress in the 1990s. 

It was sometime in the year 1994 or 1995. All the students in the Institute boys’ hostel were excited. Swami, as they lovingly called Sri Sathya Sai Baba, had agreed to grant them all a “PC session.” The term PC stands for “Poorna Chandra”, the auditorium (one of the largest pillarless ones in Asia) at Prasanthi Nilayam ashram. The PC session, like the Trayee session, was a special session which Swami granted only for the students and teachers of the University. And just like in the Trayee session, many interesting things would happen in a PC session and Swami would speak ‘informally’. 

That PC session turned out to be unforgettable in terms of the lessons it provided.

As the boys entered the auditorium, they saw multiple piles of so many things heaped up. They quickly took their places to sit on the carpets spread on the floor. And then began the excited talk. Apparently, Swami had decided to gift all the boys with something. Everyone was discussing about what the gifts probably might be. 

Swami arrived on the dais and there was a hush that fell on the entire gathering. He gently glided to the end of the stage and descended. Moving to the first pile, He picked up the first thing that His hand could get hold of and threw it to the boy nearby. It was a canister of shaving foam. Then, He summoned some boys and told them to simply give away one each of the items to all the boys gathered. 

The heaps of objects turned out to be toiletries and each boy was getting something at total random. While one got a toothbrush, one got a shampoo while yet another got a deodorant stick. The ‘luckier’ ones got perfume bottles and electric shavers. Within moments, the silence was gone and there was loud murmur that developed in the auditorium as each student looked at what the other got and compared gifts. 

Naturally, those that got ‘mere toothbrushes’ envied those that got the electric shavers. But those boys too were not free of envy - they longed for the perfumes. It was not as if those that got perfumes were happy. The bottles were only 100 ml and would soon get exhausted. So, they had gifts which they could not use if they wanted to preserve the memory. In short, though all were happy in some way or the other, all were sad too in a way! 

Sai Thy Kingdom Come - Thoughts on the Second Appearance of Sri Sathya Sai Baba

Can we understand His words?

Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba left His physical frame on the 24th of April 2011. When that happened, there was widespread disbelief among the devotees. According to various public instances and references, Baba had said that He would be in His physical frame till 92, 94 or 96 years of age with the ‘96-years’ concept being the most popular version. How then, could He leave at 85? Thus, came the ‘theories’ of a second coming, a return to the physical of Bhagawan Baba. Then came the compilation - Sai, Thy Kingdom Come - by S.Narayan which brought together all the different things Bhagawan had said about the ‘length’ of His life. It presented evidence from the various scriptures, Nadis and the like while proposing a second coming. It also presented dreams and visions of different devotees that suggested Swami's second appearance as evidence. I must say, it felt really wonderful reading the same.

However, whenever I read, heard or came to know about different accounts regarding His second coming, a voice from within kept persistently throwing up a single statement which Bhagawan often made - a statement so poignant and profound that one could meditate for long just on it. This was the statement of Baba that my heart kept showing me,
“When you cannot understand my silence, how will you understand my words?”

The Mahasamadhi was a black swan event and it was chosen by the Avatar of the Age definitely to communicate several messages of wisdom to mankind. One of those, I firmly believe, is to prod us to start listening to and understanding His silence. Instead of doing that, if we start discussions and debates on when and how He will start 'talking' again, aren't we missing the whole point?

The Divine Word is the Veda Vakya

God’s words are always the TRUTH. In fact, a Vedic scholar was once asked,
“Swami keeps telling various things about what is in the Vedas. Are those things really present in the Vedic texts?”
The scholar, Sri Kamavadhani, replied emphatically,
“Fool, Swami’s Word itself is the Veda!”
According to him, Swami’s word defined the Vedic word and not the other way around. It was not the case of checking whether what Swami spoke was the truth or not for His speech defined the Truth.  His first name, Sathya, means Truth and the Universe realigns itself to follow His every utterance. 

So, don't get me wrong. I am not disregarding even slightly the words spoken by Swami. What I am pondering is simply about our ability to understand those words. There is the story of a sage undertaking a penance for centuries in an attempt to understand the Vedas. At the end of it, he realizes that if the Vedas were the four mountains, his understanding has been equivalent to a grain of sand! These are metaphorical stories to indicate that when it comes to divinity, the intellect and the mind are grossly inadequate in imparting an understanding. That understanding lies in the realm which is beyond the mind and the intellect. 

The debate here is not about what Bhagawan said, but of our understanding of what He said. 

Bhagawan's startling declaration in the interview room

The drama ‘Daivam Manusha Roopena’ (presented by the 11th grade students on March 29, 2007) was on the life of Shirdi Baba. When the scene of Shirdi Baba leaving the body for three days came, Swami went into the interview room. There, He made a revelation that literally left the students, Divij Desai and Harish Krishan. dumbstruck.

Missing what we want because of how we want it - God's dilemma

Seeking the magic of a Divine visit

Among the several magical memories that a Sai-student carries of life at the Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning, a Divine visit to the hostel often ranks very high. When Swami visits the hostel, it feels like the Lord wanted to call all the students for an interview but did not have an interview room as big as His heart! And so, He decides to visit the students in the hostel -  it is like a mass private interview on the largest scale! Such a visit brings many close interactions with Swami. He speaks to the students and the students express their feelings for Him through conversations, talks, short skits and songs. There are momentous materializations and rousing revelations.  A taste of such a visit can be obtained by reading the happenings during one such visit that had taken place in 2003. Each visit is unique and the ‘uncertainty’ about how it will unravel only adds to the anticipation and excitement.

The memorable Divine visit to the hostel in March 2003

Thus, every student of the SSSIHL wishes to be part of at least one Divine visit to the hostel. The students in our batch were no exception!  It is no wonder that we wanted such a repeat of history. But Swami always has His ways of refusing to make such a visit unless the boys plead hard enough. We prepared ourselves for such excuses of the Lord, and went to the mandir armed with a large invitation card. The card had many photos of Swami with the students during many previous hostel visits and the wording was this,

“Swami, our home is empty without you. Please bless it with your loving visit.”

Different gender, same scenes! Swami's visit to the girls' hostel in Anantapur brings thrill to everyone.

It was the 28th of February in 2005. The clock face in Sai Kulwant Hall proclaimed 4:15 pm when Swami came out on His darshan rounds. As He neared us, we got up on our knees with the card and showed it to Him. He looked at the card and said out aloud,

“EMPTY.”

“Swami, it is empty because You are not there. If You visit our hostel, it will cease to be empty. It will become full!”, we answered.

Swami nodded and told us to go back and sit in our places.

Do we miss what we seek because of how we wish to get it?

There is a popular story that goes as follows.

A town gets flooded and there is water everywhere. A pious man is trapped on the roof of a building and has nowhere to go. The rising flood waters are slowly encircling the building and he has nowhere to go. But he is not at all worried. His faith in God is firm and he simply starts praying. He says,

“Dear God. All my life I have worshipped you and have had steady faith in you. Please come to my rescue.”

Within a few minutes, the waters have risen a few more meters and it is only a matter of 15 more minutes before they swallow the building completely. Presently, a boat comes by and the boatman shouts out,

“Sir! I have place for one more on my boat. Would you care to join?”

“No! You carry on and save someone else. God will save me.”

The boat goes away.

Minutes before the building is completely submerged, a helicopter comes above and, over the megaphone, a shout is heard,

“Sir! Please hold on. We shall rescue you.”

“I DON’T WANT YOUR HELP. GOD WILL SAVE ME. YOU PLEASE CARRY ON”, the man screams back.

God's PUSH is always for the greater good of the individual

How many times do we go through something in life, wondering why that is happening to us. We are convinced that life would be much better if things proceed in the manner of our thinking. Hours, days, weeks, months or (sometimes) even years may pass. One day, suddenly, looking back on those very same episodes in life, we are grateful for them because they have made us what we are today.

In matters concerning Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba, my God, Master and best friend, I always felt that I wasted those ten-odd years of my life during which I did not know Him. I used to wonder how much better life would be if only I had come to Him earlier. Today, in retrospect, I am simply happy because I am convinced of God’s perfect timing which I have experienced and understood multiple times. Of course, there are still those instances where I do not understand why something is happening. I try to tell myself in complete faith that things are happening in the best manner possible - only that I am not yet aware of the significance and beauty of the Lord’s action. That is the secret of surrender.

Let Go... Let God

A big opportunity and an even bigger challenge

In 1994, I had wanted to study in Swami’s school but was not getting admission at Puttaparthi. I was told that I could apply in the Puttaparthi school only for grade 11. Desperate to be in His school at any cost, I had got myself admitted at the Sri Sathya Sai Vidyapeeth in Calicut, Kerala. I was in 8th grade in 1995 when I was presented with an irresistible offer after I won the Hindi elocution competition.

“Would you like to deliver a speech in Hindi for the festival of Onam in Sai Kulwant hall, Prasanthi Nilayam, in Bhagawan’s divine presence?”

I was thrilled. I would have been ready to memorise and deliver a speech in French also if it was in Swami’s immediate presence! I nodded and jumped at the opportunity.

The opportunity was also a big challenge. My Hindi was (and is) at best average. The elocution competition victory was simply an ode to my memorizing skills and definitely not a confirmation of my mastery over India’s national language! So, I decided to use the same technique as the elocution competition for this speech also - I decided to learn it by-heart!

I had two months to prepare and I requested my Hindi teacher to write down the entire speech for me. Then began the act of ‘mugging’, the colloquial term at school for committing something to memory!  Weeks of labour and hundreds of rehearsals later, I had become adept in my speech. In fact, if someone woke me up in my sleep and uttered “Aum Sri Sai Ram” - the first line of my speech - I could simply rattle out in the next 7.5 minutes my entire speech with the voice modulation and body language! I was quite well prepared for Onam in the Divine presence.

In order to justify some of the feelings I went through later, I must give a brief background of the atmosphere in my school which was also called Sri Sailam.

A picture that fills me with nostalgia today - the bust of Swami in the 'Mantapam' welcoming everyone into Sri Sailam.

Part 2 - Practice makes one perfect and attracts God's grace - Ashwath Narayan's experience with Sathya Sai

Brindavan, the place where a student develops pining

The absence of the Sadguru or God in one’s life is indeed an unfortunate situation. However, if that absence comes after one has tasted the Grace of the Sadguru or God, it becomes a blessing. Then, it increases the pining in the heart for one’s Sadguru or God. The Brindavan campus of the Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning served as a fertile ground where the devotion of the students and teachers alike grew by pining for the physical form of Swami. Invariably, any student who graduated from XII grade would be sent to the Brindavan campus. Ashwath Narayan thus found himself as a student pursuing the Bachelors of Science degree for Biosciences at Brindavan. That was only the temporary pursuit - his ultimate goal was Swami.

If you have arrived here directly, you are requested to read this part after completing part 1 at the link below:

Practice makes one perfect and attracts God's grace - Ashwath Narayan's experience with Sathya Sai_ Part 1

In an attempt to make up for Swami’s absence, many teachers in Brindavan hold Parayanam sessions. They narrate experiences with Swami to the students, feeding the flames of love for Swami. It was during one such Parayanam session with Sundareshan sir that Ashwath’s heart was set aflame with a desire. Sundareshan sir narrated the experiences of a bhajan singer, S.Ravikumar. The point that struck Ashwath deeply was the silent understanding between Ravikumar and Swami.

“Sometimes Swami indicates to Ravi to sing with a gentle eye-movement. That is enough for him to understand what Swami wants him to sing and when. Nobody else would have noticed but Ravi would have received the communication”, Sundareshan sir said.

'Ravi Bhaiya' or 'Ravi sir' has been an inspiration and role model for many generation of singers that included Ashwath also.

Ashwath knew Ravikumar. He was a legend among the bhajan singer and an icon who had shunned the possible glory that he could have achieved in the world in order to keep singing for Swami. Ashwath had also got the privilege of singing alongside him in the previous year at Brindavan. On that occasion Ashwath had himself sung the Kannada song, “Jagaddhodharana”. It was simply beautiful singing about the little Krishna in Brindavan.

Several days later, when Ashwath offered a rose to Swami before the Arati, Swami asked,

“Voice not good?”

Ashwath did not respond. He just sat at His feet.

Swami waved his palm, materialized vibhuti and gave it to him. Ashwath bowed and took padanamaskar. When he rose, Swami asked in Tamil,

“Sapdacha (Did you eat)?”

Ashwath understood and he put the entire vibhuti into his mouth. Swami then received Arati and left.

Even as he reminisced the day, a desire arose from the depths of Ashwath’s heart,

“How I wish to be able to receive communication from Swami like Ravikumar”, he thought.

As they say, “Do your best and God will do the rest”. Only the efforts rest in human realms but a lot can be done with efforts. Ashwath’s practice went in hand with his pining. The summer of 2004 came and with it, Swami arrived to Brindavan.  The students in Brindavan may get less number of days to interact with Swami but they get something very special - the Trayee Sessions. These were sessions with Swami inside His residence, Trayee Brindavan.

During one such Trayee Session, Ashwath had managed to sit in the front lines near the Jhoola on which Swami was seated. Swami was interacting with the students and teachers. Out of the blue, Ashwath felt Swami look at him from the corner of His eye. Ashwath straightened up and sat in all alertness. Then, it came! A very gentle eye-movement indicating to him to start. It was such a subtle movement that nobody noticed. But for Ashwath, it seemed as loud and clear as an oral order.

Being God's driver - The life and story of Padmanabhan with Sri Sathya Sai_ Part 3

Padmanabhan driving a unique vehicle during
darshan. This epitomises his life with Swami.
Though he was His driver, it was always
Swami in the front seat and him in the
backseat. 

Wedded for life

Swami had brought up the topic of Padmanabhan’s wedding in June 1994. October had already arrived but Swami had not yet given a date for the wedding. The months of grappling with uncertainty had given way to a kind of resigned serenity in Padmanabhan. He had stopped fretting and was accepting Swami’s ‘vagaries’ as they came about. That is when he made an interesting discovery. When he was amenable to Swami’s ‘vagaries’, those very same vagaries seemed to fade away!

In fact, Swami had told him with complete confirmation to hold the wedding in Kerala. Now, as his mother and brother pestered him for a date, he told them that he would inform them as soon as Swami gave one to him. Just a few days before the wedding, Swami gave him a date - the 24th of October. Padmanabhan accepted it with humility and conveyed it home. A new debate cropped up,

“Wouldn’t it be better to have the wedding on 23rd October?”

“Swami said that it should be 24th October”, Padmanabhan replied.

“23rd is advantageous on two counts. It is an auspicious day based on the Panchangam. It is also a Sunday which makes it easier for all friends and relatives to attend the wedding...”

Padmanabhan, who was totally in sync with Swami’s words, replied,

“If it is inauspicious, I am the one affected right. I have no problem with it. And if people are unable to come, I still don’t bother. What matters is that we follow what Swami says.”

His was the final word and the wedding was fixed for 24th October. Padmanabhan informed Swami that he would be leaving for Kerala as per His command. Swami called him in and blessed him. He gave him enough money to cover most of the expenses of the wedding. He also blessed him with the jewellery and Mangalsutra which he would have to gift his wife. Padmanabhan was in tears. Swami had told him that he would take care of everything, of course. But here, He was taking care of him more than a parent; more than a close friend; more than what he would himself do for him! With gratitude oozing from the heart, Padmanabhan left for Kerala.

{This is the final concluding part of a 3-part story. To enjoy it to the maximum, it is recommended that you read this after the first two parts. 

PART 1: Being God's driver - The life and story of Padmanabhan with Sri Sathya Sai_ Part 1

PART 2: Being God's driver - The life and story of Padmanabhan with Sri Sathya Sai_ Part 2
}

A gentle rainfall in India is considered auspicious. What happened in Kerala on 23rd October was something drastic. Possibly it was an ‘over-auspicious’ day and the fury with which the rains lashed out was unbelievable. Everyone was thankful that the wedding had not been fixed for that day because it would have meant a severe ‘washing away’ of many well-laid plans. In

Playing the harmonium for Sai's bhajans - student S.V.Satheesh's experiences_ PART 1

S.V.Satheesh with his dear harmonium during a programme in Brindavan,
Bengaluru.

A long cherished dream gets fulfilled

In the summer of 2002, S.V.Satheesh sat in the tiny room with extreme exhaustion. It was nearly 3 am and the whole night had been one of great effort for him. For almost a week now, he had been recording what could possibly become his first ever musical album. And today, he had just completed recording the last piece. Though he was feeling fatigued, he was also feeling fulfilled! This was a long-cherished dream come true - a dream that had formed in his student days at the Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning.

Satheesh was ‘just another’ student who got enrolled for BSc in the college at Prasanthi Nilayam in 1992. His bonding with his Swami was almost instantaneous and he decided that he wanted to occupy a special place in His heart - just as He had occupied a special place in his! When he was wondering how should go about achieving his desire, Swami’s statement in several discourses struck him - “God is a lover of music. Lord Narayana told sage Narada that wherever a devotee sings his glory, He will install Himself there.”

And so, with a prayer to play for Him, Satheesh started learning the harmonium, practicing for almost 3-4 hours every day. He had no idea how he would get his first chance to play for Swami, but he just persevered and practiced rigorously. It was the beginning of a life-long saga.

Today, Satheesh has almost mastered several musical instruments - the harmonium, the accordion, the saxophone, the tabla, the mridangam, the violin and the santoor! By virtue of his ability to play the electronic  keyboard, he can surely claim to be able to play another hundred instruments at least - he just has to press the right buttons! It was either the harmonium, accordion or keyboard that he had played throughout his student-life at the Institute. That is why, today he was feeling fulfilled - because he had just completed a music album, playing the Indian santoor!

Satheesh felt an immense surge of gratitude towards his Swami. And in that flow of gratitude, he recollected how he had got his first ever chance to play the harmonium in Swami’s presence.

The wait and the big break

There is a magical thing about diligence that even skill and talent cannot match - longevity. One’s skills and talents may fade away one day but the results of hard work are always here to stay. Satheesh’s persistent practice ensured that he was soon playing the harmonium during the bhajan sessions in the hostel and the college. However, he was constantly aiming for that big break - to play in Swami’s physical presence. But then, there were stalwart harmonium players already - Sailesh sir, Arunesh and Anand Punjabi to name a few. How was he to get his chance? Satheesh waited patiently and worked diligently with faith. After all, faith is believing in what one cannot see which ultimately leads one to see what one believes in!

It was the January of 1993 and the practice for the drama, Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu, was in full swing. This was the drama that had been presented in Swami’s presence during the previous year’s convocation (22nd November 1992) and Bhagawan wanted the drama to be re-enacted for a Cardiology conference being held in the SSSIHMS in January. S.Ravikumar was playing the lead role in that drama. Well, his experiences with Swami are beautiful and touching and they have been detailed in other blogs. The point is that the drama was almost a musical and thus involved the entire music group. And since the practice sessions (which Swami attended) were in the Institute auditorium, the music group would also be assembled there everyday. This was essential because in the 1990s, there was nothing like background recording and all the dramas in the divine presence went on with live dialogues and live singing!

"Why fear when I am here" - the story of Anantappa and Sathya Sai

The relationship between God and the devotee is the relationship between God and God!

God and devotee

It was one of those famous ‘Trayee sessions’ at Brindavan, Whitefield (Bangalore). Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba, ‘Swami’ as He is affectionately called, was seated on the ornate swing in the jhoola room and all around were the students who had decided to stay back in the ashram even during the summer vacations. This was a ‘sacrifice’ that they had gladly made for they knew for sure that they would receive much more than they had ‘given up’. Nothing is greater than being near and dear to the Master, their Swami, whom many even considered as their Lord. I too was among those students who considered Swami as his Master and Lord and so, for me, every word that fell from His lips and every action that He did was of great significance.

That day, Swami asked one of the senior teachers, Sri.Sanjay Sahni, to address the boys. As always, Sahni sir had a unique style of blending stories with messages. That day, he chose a very reassuring theme - that God will never sit quiet when a devotee is harmed or subjected to injustice. He narrated the experience of a devotee who was not ‘worldly-wise’ or ‘smart’. Thus, he was naturally exploited by many in different ways - especially emotionally and financially. During the narration, I was lost in my thoughts of Swami as I was sitting quite close to the swing. So, I am unable to remember the details of the experience he narrated. However, I cannot forget the ending statement that Sahni sir made,

“If you criticize the Lord or even harm Him, God will forgive you but just touch His devotee and you are finished!”

I remember that statement because there was a spontaneous applause and Swami looked at Sahni sir as if asking him to repeat the final statement. Sahni sir repeated the statement with greater volume and greater emphasis and that message got firmly reinforced in my heart.

In times of trouble

Many have been the instances in life when I know that people are being unfair to me or are trying the cheat/harm me. Sometimes, these ‘people’ have been those who are apparently very influential, powerful and wealthy. What I mean to say is that when they decide to put you into trouble, it looks like nobody can save you. You feel a great fear in the heart and think that maybe the best way out would be to compromise your stance and bend in front of them. At such times, it feels as though it does not matter what is ‘RIGHT’ or ‘WRONG’. Might automatically becomes right and since you are a weakling, you just have to shut up.

It is precisely in those times that I always recollect this episode at Trayee Brindavan. There is definitely a reason why Swami made Sahni sir repeat that statement. He wants it to be drilled deep within me that come what may, when I am right, the greatest power in the Universe is on my side. And that is the power of goodness or the power of God. So, all that I have to do is ensure that I am good and on the right path. The Lord may be loving and forgiving enough to suffer pain and ignominy. But He will not tolerate it if such pain and ignominy befalls the one who is dear to Him; the one who is on the path of goodness and love. Before I dilate further on a few other points, I must relate the powerful experience of Ananthappa’s daughter. This has been recorded by the legendary Prof.N.Kasturi in his autobiography, Loving God.

Anantappa’s problem

Anantappa was one among the sixteen peons at the college in Davanagere, Karnataka, where Kasturi was the College Head. He was slow in his thinking and considered by everyone as a dullard. He had difficulty carrying out the simplest of commands and any shopkeeper who was unscrupulous could cheat him with the greatest ease. He slept when he was supposed to be on guard-duty and did not seem to understand whether he was being scolded or praised.

And yet, Kasturi employed his services because he was a very pious soul. He seemed to have all his mind and heart dedicated to Swami. He spent hours of sincere efforts when it came to things related to Swami. Kasturi felt that Anantappa would surely lose his job if he was in the service of any other. Kasturi felt redeemed in his choice when Swami reciprocated Anantappa’s love. Swami showered him with grace divine and, on one occasion when Kasturi had taken him along to Puttaparthi, told Kasturi that Anantappa was not an ordinary soul. In his slum dwelling surrounded by drunkards, drug-addicts and vagabonds, Anantappa was like the saintly Vibhishana in Lanka, Swami had said. Numerous were the miracles that Swami performed to safeguard Anantappa and his family. That was the reason why the world could not take him for a ride even though he was a dullard - Swami would never allow that!

Anantappa’s younger daughter was wedded to an employee of the Mysore Railways(which has today been replaced by Southern Railways). This son-in-law, though a smart and intelligent man was of a highly suspicious nature. He always felt that his wife was flirtatious and even suspected that she kept the window of the house to ogle at men on the streets! In spite of all her explanations and pleas, he did not listen to her and often locked her within the home without even allowing a window to be opened. He even beat her at times based on his suspicions. Anantappa tried a lot to convince his son-in-law that his daughter was chaste and pure but it was all in vain.

Doubt is such a deadly demon and there is absolutely not cure for it! And before we start to criticize Anantappa’s son-in-law for his dastardly acts, we should examine our own selves to realize how often we fall prey to this demon called doubt. As Swami says, when things do not ‘seem’ to be going our way, we begin to doubt even God! We wonder at times whether God, in His ultimate knowledge, actually knows what is good for us? The demon of doubt can be defeated only by the angel of faith. But hey wait! Faith is so ‘unscientific’ right? Faith implies taking things at face-value without deep inquiry. Faith is only for those that are irrational!

Please allow me a much-needed detour before I get back on track to Anantappa’s son-in-law’s story.

Faith is about being rationally irrational instead of being irrationally rational

A simple case to point here. How do you know that you are your father’s child? Isn’t it because your mother told you that and you have faith in her words?

“Nah! I have a birth certificate issued by the doctor in the hospital that I was born. So, its not as if I am my father’s child because of faith.”
That means that you have faith in the doctor and the hospital where you were supposedly born. How are you sure that the doctor is not lying? Or that he is hand in glove in a nefarious scam with your ‘alleged’ mother/father?

“I see where you are going. But don’t think that proves me to be unscientific in my conviction about my parents. There is this thing called parental testing which is scientific. I can get that done.”
But hey! Wait a minute! You mean to say that you have faith in the instrument that does the test? How are you sure that there is no malfunction of the instrument? Worse still, how do you know that the method works? Isn’t that confidence based on faith that every hospital in the world is using the method and so it must be true? How can YOU be sure? Have you personally checked it?

If one goes on this way, one will realize that the only way one can be scientific is to have all the knowledge in the world - biological, engineering, medical, chemical etc. Then alone one will not need to take anything on faith. Else, somewhere along the line, one would have to have faith. There is no other choice. Now, here is the ‘faith way’ of parental testing. It works this way - Accept the person as your father/mother and the way he/she treats you in life will prove to you that the person has to be a parent to be so loving and sacrificing!

That is why, when science screams, “Seeing is believing”, Faith softly but firmly proclaims,
“Believing is seeing.” All said and done, faith is the only cure for doubt.

Swami cures the doubt of Anantappa’s son-in-law

Frustrated with her imprisoned life, the wife told her husband,

“Take me to Puttaparthi and ask Baba about me. He will vouch that I am a faithful wife to you. Else, I shall put an end to my life by jumping into the well there and you will be rid of me forever.”

Hearing the drastic words, the son-in-law agreed to accompany Anantappa and his family to Puttaparthi. With great love, Swami immediately granted them a personal audience. Without even being updated of the state of affairs, Swami told the doubting son-in-law,

“Your wife is as pure as Mother Sita (consort of Lord Rama). She is as noble and loving as Mother Parvati (consort of Lord Shiva). Take care of her.”

The son-in-law was struck by Baba’s omniscience and he nodded. Swami told Anantappa,

“Don’t worry. He is a good fellow. They will live happily from now on.”

But Swami’s words somehow seemed to be going wrong as the son-in-law was again caught by doubts. He wondered whether Anantappa and Baba had conspired to create this drama of ‘omniscience’. He charged his wife of infidelity and said he would take revenge. He got up and stormed out of the room, without bothering about Swami’s presence. Swami just smiled.

That night itself, the son-in-law said that they should leave Puttaparthi. At Penukonda railway station, the four got into the Bangalore-bound train. The son-in-law, by virtue of being an employee of the Railways, could get a first-class seating for his family. However, doubts and thoughts of revenge made him place his in-laws and wife in the wooden-seater, third-class compartment. He himself got into the empty first-class compartment. Now, he could plan the remaining part of his revenge in the solitude of luxury he thought.

The next morning, Anantappa was shocked to see a completely transformed son-in-law. He spoke humbly and sweetly and treated his wife with the greatest dignity and respect. In fact, he never locked her up ever again and almost worshipped her. Every month, he even submitted his entire salary to her to use for the house as per her discrimination and just sought a paltry sum of 15 Rupees as his pocket expenses! And Anantappa’s family indeed lived happily after that, just as Swami had said.

The consequences of ‘touching’ a devotee

What had actually transpired was something that Kasturi got to know later in a strange sequence of events. When he was waiting for a bus, his student came along in a horse-carriage and offered him a lift. Then, this sworn athiest of a student asked Kasturi about Puttaparthi and Baba. He was actually eager to meet him. When Kasturi asked him the reason for such sudden spiritual thirst, the student, a Railway Guard by profession, related the happenings of that fateful night when Anantappa’s son-in-law was transformed. He had been a personal witness to the events as they transpired.

Anantappa’s son-in-law was deeply lost in his plotting and planning in the late hours of the night in the first-class compartment. When the train was about 10 kilometers from the Thondebhavi railway station, all the lights in the compartment suddenly were ablaze and turned deep red. Suddenly, he saw Swami. But there was not one Swami. There were Swami’s everywhere and He seemed so angry. Blows began to rain on him from all sides and he was wondering how could Baba get on to a speeding train? How did He multiply Himself and how did He know what he was planning to do? But all those thoughts soon vanished as the pain from the blows hit him. Swami said,
“Won’t you believe me when I say she is innocent? Stop beating her! She is my child! In fact, all those who suffer are mine…”

Such was the impact and pain from the blows that the son-in-law rushed out of the compartment at Thondebhavi seeking solace and protection. His face and body were badly battered and he complained to the Railway Guard. Moments later, the compartment was completely empty and there was not a single red light therein. Anatappa’s son-in-law had experienced a transformation, albeit a forced one.

Months later, Kasturi was with Swami when He said that in His previous Avatar at Shirdi, He even beat people with sticks in apparent ‘bursts of anger’. Kasturi asked,

“Swami, in this Avatar, have you hit any one?”
“No. This Avatar is all love.”
“Still Swami, if not directly, have you hit anyone indirectly?”
“That is also out of love”, replied Swami with a twinkle in the eye.
Kasturi also just smiled in understanding as his heart completed,
“Love showered on a poor, hapless daughter!”

Concluding thoughts

“Why fear when I am here”.

Swami’s statement takes on new meaning for me here. All that I have to do is ensure that I am on the path of goodness and purity. Swami’s protective bubble is around me always when I do that and I have nothing to worry. Great forces in the universe may conspire against me but they are no match to the greatest force in the Universe that is protecting me. That is why the ancient Indian scriptures emphatically stated,

“Dharmo Rakshati Rakshitaha. Dharma Eva Hatho Hanthi.”
(Righteousness/Goodness protects those that protect Righteousness/Goodness. Righteousness/Goodness destroys those that destroy Righteousness/Goodness.)

Now that gives us reason to be good and fearless. It gives us reason and need to realize the importance of being good. Right? And while I am being good and following righteousness, those that wish to malign, criticize or torment me, beware! I have a great good wonderful Lord watching over me! Hehehehehehehehehe!

If you enjoyed this article, you might also like:

1. An amazing experience with Sathya Sai and the Suka Nadi

2. Sathya Sai fulfills a promise He gave as Shirdi Sai

3. Being an apple of the eye for God

4. The Sri Sathya Sai Education revolution sweeping across Karnataka

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