When God says 'Yes' or 'Wait'...
For
most of us, a prayer often turns out to be a request for help. Of course, at
times there are prayers of gratitude too, but more often than not, such prayers
come immediately after the request-prayers! We pray for something, God grants
it and, there you go, we offer a prayer of gratitude. These are instances when
God says 'Yes' to our prayers and gives us what we want. There are some other
instances when God says 'Wait' to our prayers. With firm faith that God's delays are not His denials, we
wait with patience and perseverance. At the right moment when the prayer is
fulfilled, we realize how perfect God's timing was and offer our gratitude. We seem to reflect God's own
statement back to Him saying, "When it comes to offering gratitude, our
delays too are not our denials." We rejoice when God says 'Wait' because
though He may not give us what we want, He gives us something better.
But
what if God says 'No'? I mean it is not a joy-filling 'Yes' or a hope-arising
'Wait' but a flat 'No' on the face? It is in this connection that I recall an
episode which occurred on the 28th of July, 2010. This was the day when my God
and best friend, Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba, gave a flat 'No' to a very
'reasonable' prayer that I made. What did that teach me? The message will be
better understood when we go through the happenings of the day. But for those
who are curious, I can drop a little hint. The answer lies in the Madhurashtakam
composed by the great Vallabhacharya which describes every aspect of the Lord
in the Krishna form as sweet and charming.
So, yes, even when God says 'No' it is sweet and charming!
A cataract to be operated
After
my father's retirement in the May of 2010, my parents had shifted to
Puttaparthi to settle down for life as per Swami's instructions. They were in
bliss, enjoying darshan twice a day
on a daily basis. I too felt so happy for them. This was that period in my life
which I wished would go on forever. Within a few blissful weeks, my father
began to complain about his inability to see clearly through his right eye. Having experienced a cataract
operation for his left eye before,
he was convinced that this was a cataract problem. I immediately sought an
appointment with the ophthalmologist at the Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher
Medical Sciences.
The
doctor examined my father's eye and confirmed that it was indeed a cataract and
a hard one at that. He said,
"Of
course this surgery can be performed here. But I would strongly recommend that it
is performed by Dr.K. He is currently visiting our general hospital in
Bangalore and I could forward this case to him if you agree."
Trusting
the doctor's wisdom, I agreed.
My
father, being a cardiac patient, needed a cardiac clearance certificate before
he could undergo the operation. (The story of his 'heart attack' is another wonderful experience in itself. That is what
happens with Swami - the worst of experiences too become memorable.) We
obtained that certificate and the date chosen for the operation was the 2nd of
August, 2010. This was when I felt that I must inform Swami and seek His
blessings for the same.
So,
on the 28th of July, a Wednesday, I borrowed a pen from my neighbour in the darshan lines and began writing a letter
to Swami. I wrote in brief about the happenings so far and sought His blessings
for the operation which was slated to be performed on the coming Monday. Having
completed the letter, I waited for Swami to arrive.