This is Part 4 of the story of how Bhagawan Baba helped me make my career choice.
If you have arrived straight here, please take a few minutes to read the first few parts to ensure continuity and better understanding. Part 1 is posted here.
Part 2 is posted here.
Part 3 is posted here.
How God changed my disappointment into appointment.
This is the concluding Part 4
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| A message from the Lord can come in many ways... |
Tryst with Divinity
For the second time in 3 days, the three of us went into the bhajan hall and took seats in the front. There was no ‘emergency’ as such but ever since we had received that encouraging nod from Swami, Bhagawan Baba, on 31st March, things had changed for us. We were given the front seats without any problems. We waited for the Veda chanting to begin and usher into the Sai Kulwant Hall that beautiful orange-robed form. That happened within a few minutes.
Even as I waited, I picked up an inspirational book of short stories that one of the students was reading. Suddenly, my mind said,
“Seek a message.”
It is a habit among many to randomly open a book and seek a message. I too am part of that ‘message seeking’ mass! So, I closed my eyes and opened the book. The short story that came in front of my eyes was - The meeting that was not to be.
Immediately, I did not feel so good. And the Veda chanting began, signaling Swami’s arrival for darshan. Within ten minutes, the darshan was completed and Swami came towards the interview room. As He was entering the interview room, He cast a cursory glance into the bhajan hall. His face seemed to contort in irritation (that is what I thought). It seemed to ask,
“What are these boys doing here?”
Then He went in.
I did not want to confide my fears to the other two boys. I opened the book again and went to that story which seemed to have negatively sealed my fate. As I read the story, I saw a happy ending (naturally it had to be good because it was an inspirational book). In the end, the ‘meeting’ actually took place in the story and gave me the same hope for my story too.
Swami came out within a few minutes and stopped near the bhajan hall entrance. He beckoned to us and we three moved to the wheelchair that He was seated on.
“Swami, the vice-chancellor met us...”, I began.
“The vice-chancellor met me too. He showed me the photos of you three as well”, He replied with a smile.
He then looked at Dhananjay, the other boy and asked,
“What does your mother say about this?”
“Swami, my mother is very happy. She told me to do whatever you say and be with you always...”
It was such a touching moment. Dhananjay’s story has been one filled with love and grace. (Hear Dhananjay’s interview by downloading the Morning Glory audio file.) After losing his father at a young age, Dhananjay has had Swami stand by him like a father, taking important decisions. But Swami, on His part, never goes against the words of one’s parents. He ensures that whatever the child does is in sync with his/her parents’ wishes.
“Mother is the first God. Father is the second God. A teacher is the third God. Then comes God”, He says.
He did not ask me or the other boy about what our parents feel because He already knew the answers. To take the conversation further, I started,
“Swami, the vice-chancellor gave us a choice. He told us to choose...”
“Ay”, Swami cut me midway, “if you want to make Swami happy, go make that Venkatraman (Prof.G.V) happy.”
That was it. Final! All the three of us fell at His feet and told Him that we would go and join Radiosai immediately. Swami said,
“What is the hurry? It is your vacation now. Go for your holidays. You can join after the vacation.”
The brief but fruitful meeting was complete. We were all very happy and touched. It is amazing how Swami thinks of the little things in such a perfect manner. Though I was very keen to get a ‘job’ at Prasanthi, it was definitely true that I was desperately in need of a break after a hectic examination schedule.
Doubt is a real demon
The reader would have surely concluded that by now, I was the happiest man around. I wasn’t! There was this lurking fear in my mind that I should not count my chickens till they hatch. Swami had promised to give me a job no doubt, but the job was not yet mine. So, I didn’t leave for vacation. I stayed on at Puttaparthi, regularly attending darshan and bhajan sessions. In the meanwhile, I also started going to Radiosai studios in the free time to learn photo-editing and video-editing softwares. Days turned into weeks in this manner.
Then, news arrived that Swami would be leaving for Kodaikanal in the summer. As always, He would be taking a few students along. My hopes were raised. I was hoping to be a part of the group selected by the Lord to travel with the Lord. That was not meant to be and so, I felt, I would have to take my vacation as Swami had said. But then, Dhananjay was picked by Swami to accompany Him to Kodaikanal. I felt very happy for him. At the same time, this fed the demon of doubt in me.
Why only Dhananjay and not the other two of us? Does this mean that he is in and we two are not?
I had no answers and had troubled thoughts. I was thinking,
“Tomorrow, Swami will leave. Will He remember to give me a job when He returns? I am sure Dhananjay will get through, but what about us two?”
I did not want to bank on being a tag-along to Dhananjay because of my previous experience during MSc days (as mentioned in Part 1 of this article). What was I to do?
I decided that I would make myself as ‘visible’ as possible to Swami so that He doesn't forget!
The vacation
Armed with my camera, I moved towards the Sri Sathya Sai Airport to bid goodbye to Swami who would be flying to Madurai and then going to Kodaikanal. Soon, His car arrived and I started firing away at the shutter release button. In the process of taking pictures, I even boarded the aircraft (without a boarding pass)! Swami sat in the first seat along the aisle in the aircraft. I took a picture of Him and He smiled. Then, I took a picture of His feet which were covered in beautiful sandals. He again smiled and granted padanamaskar to both me and Sai Prakash who was on the video camera. Then, we ‘shooters’ alighted from the aircraft, craning our necks to catch a last glimpse of Swami through the window.
The plane taxied on the runway and took off. A day later, I too took off to Mumbai, to spend the vacation with my parents. Before leaving, I told Sai Prakash,
“The minute you receive news that Swami is returning to Puttaparthi, please let me know. I will rush back. I was the last person whose face Swami saw when He took off. Mine should be the first face He sees when He lands back in Puttaparthi.”
My body went to Mumbai no doubt, but my heart and mind were left behind with Swami. All my focus was on when Swami would return I hoped that in Kodaikanal, Dhananjay would ‘remind’ Swami once or twice about the pending appointments. As a family, we took a vacation to Ganapatipule in Maharashtra. One day, as I was swimming in the resort there, I got a call. It was from Sai Prakash.
“Swami is coming back the day after”, he said, “Are you planning a return?”
That was the end of my vacation. I pleaded with my father to get me a flight ticket back to Bangalore ASAP. We left Ganapatipule the same day and were back in Mumbai. The way things panned out, I would be flying back the same day that Swami would be flying back to Puttaparthi. I was in the taxi from Bangalore airport to Puttaparthi, when I got another call from Sai Prakash.
“Swami is due to land in about an hour’s time. I am going to the airport now.”
“Please bring along my camera kit too”, I told him desperately.
Now, I turned to the driver.
“How fast can you take me to Puttaparthi from here?”
“It takes about an hour sir. But I can do it in 45 minutes...”
“My life is at stake here. Please do it as fast as you can.”
He nodded and stepped on the gas. I opened my suitcase and began to rummage through it for my whites. In the speeding taxi, I changed from my T-shirt and jeans into whites. I wet my hair and combed it in place and then applied the vibhuti dot on my forehead.
It was the 17th of May 2007 and my heart raced faster than even the speeding taxi.
Welcome and anti-climax
I made it in time! And just as I had thought, mine was indeed among the first few faces (if not the first one) that Swami saw as He descended from the aircraft. I was there again, taking photographs of the rousing welcome that Swami was given as He returned to Puttaparthi. My body united with my mind and soul and thus, it felt very welcome to me too!
From the next day onwards, it was back to waiting for me. I asked Dhananjay whether Swami had made any references to our appointments during the dozen or so days of the Kodaikanal trip. He said that on one occasion, Swami had asked him where he would work and he had replied,
“Swami, in Venkatraman sir’s studio...”
Swami had then looked at Prof.G.V and had said,
“So, it has now become your studio is it?”
Dhananjay continued,
“Sir came to me after that session and told me that I should never make that stupid mistake of calling the studio as his studio. Everything is Swami’s alone and all were just custodians.”
That, I felt, was an important point to remember for all. Whatever we have been given do not belong to us. They belong to God and we are just custodians.
Dhananjay and I decided to contact the third boy, Raju, to tell him to come over. However, we received some shocking news. Raju would not be returning to Puttaparthi. Many personal pressures had forced him to look out for a job elsewhere. Amid tears he said that he would not be able to come to Puttaparthi. We were taken aback. This was definitely a setback. For the first time, Swami had been a little ‘lax’ and ‘easy’ with taking others’ advice for appointments and here was a dropout even before the appointment! We were told that it could be detrimental for our appointments too. I feared for mine because I felt Dhananjay was through already. I continued with my prayers and daily sitting in the front.
The D-Day
The 30th of May arrived. I longingly looked at my ‘Student’ badge. It said, ‘Valid till: 31/05/2007’. I knew that this would be the second-last day for my student privileges. The same was the case with Dhananjay and Swami had not told him anything too. We decided to foray once again to the front lines of the bhajan hall. The emergency now was - no deliverance for us even after the arrival of the due date!
Swami came into the bhajan hall a few minutes before bhajans. He saw Dhananjay and me right up in the front.
“Now what?”, He saked, “You have come again?”
“Swami, we are ready to join for the job”, I said.
“Job? Where?”
Dhananjay got up on his knees, “Swami in Venkat...”
He was cut mid-sentence by the sharp pinch I gave his leg.
“Swami, in your studio...” I completed.
“Hmm”, said Swami, “What work will you do?”
“Swami, I will do photography, video-shooting, video-editing, writing articles and radio programmes...”
“Ah! That is a lot of work... And you?”
“Swami, I will do audio-recording, audio-editing and audio-mastering”, replied Dhananjay.
“Very nice... very happy.”
We immediately bent and took padanamaskar. Now, I felt, we had finally clinched it. But a little surprise packet had still been reserved by Swami.
“Don’t join now”, He said and I had surprise written all over my face. But that soon transformed into a smile as He continued,
“Join tomorrow. It is a good day.”
He gave us padanamaskar for a second time. We had feared that He would ask about the third boy. He didn’t. He knows everything right?
And so, on the 31st of May, 2007, the day my ‘Student’ badge expired, a Thursday which is Swami’s special day, I was officially a staff member of Radiosai Global Harmony. The next day, I was issued my ‘Staff’ badge and I happily ‘retired’ the ‘Student’ badge. Indeed, Swami had ensured that I would not be a ‘waiting boy’ for even a single day. The transition from ‘student’ to ‘staff’ happened for me like night transitions into day and we were the first two students from our batch to be placed in our careers.
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