God does not call the qualified; God qualifies the called - Part 1

The voice of God

Many times, the question often is asked,

“How does one distinguish between the voice of God and the voice of the mind?”

This is difficult to explain precisely because an experience can only be experienced and not explained. However, as long as we live with a mind, we shall never cease to seek explanations. And so, based on Swami’s guidance and teachings, there are some practical ways to distinguish between the mind and the heart. I still maintain that the best way is to seek that experience of hearing the Divine Voice from within, for, once the voice of God is heard, there will be no doubt as to how one can distinguish between it and the mind’s prattle.

There is no single way by which the voice of God comes to us. If there are as many ways to God, as there are many people on earth, there are at least those many ways by which God can speak to us! The Voice can come to us as an inspiration, as a dream, as some text in a book, an idea or even as a direct command which our ears perceive. Though it can come in myriad ways, when it actually comes, one just can not miss the Voice. Having ‘heard’ that voice, a sense of calm descends and a happy anticipation arises within oneself. That was exactly what happened on the 7th of December, 2013, as I woke up in the city of Chennai.

I had a dream of my Lord, my best friend, my Swami, Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba. That put me in a state of great peace. As I got ready to meet the day, one Christian quote kept bobbing within me. I had not thought about it or read about it in the near past. I had heard it years before during a Trayee session when the speaker mentioned it in Swami’s presence. There was no reason why that quote should have surfaced in me (at least, at that time it felt so). Little did I realize that Swami was actually gifting me the title for a new blog-post!

Yes! That quote was:

“God does not call the qualified; God qualifies the called.”

Whenever one reads an article, one sees the heading before delving into the actual body of the article. Swami, in His infinite love, seemed to be doing the same for me too. Even as I was pondering over the meaning and profundity of the above quote, I met Mr.Nitin Kanade, an alumnus of the Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Learning (SSSIHL), currently residing in Chennai with his wife and two sweet little daughters.  He narrated the ‘story of his life’ and the quote attained greater meaning for me. And so, instead of delving into the quote, I shall dive into his unique and thrilling story.

When the call comes...

Right from his birth in Nagpur in 1973, Nitin grew up with Swami. His father was serving in the Indian Air Force and so was regularly transferred to different parts of the country. Wherever Nitin went, he always was ‘in touch’ with Swami. A regular in Bal Vikas classes, he took Swami as his God just like his parents before him. However, the amazing thing is that till 1989, 16 long years after his birth, he never had even one darshan of Bhagawan Baba! Little did he know that the first darshan would be the turning point in his life (just as it has been in several others’ lives as well).

How his first darshan happened in May 1989 is an interesting prelude to his story. Having completed high-school education, Nitin was bent upon pursuing a career as a doctor. He applied to many prestigious colleges and was having a tough time in deciding where he would actually study. In the meanwhile, his father who was keen that Nitin be under Swami’s love and care, applied to the SSSIHL for the Bachelors of Science course. Nitin was surprised when the application form for the Institute arrived home. This was definitely not a place he wanted to be in because he felt that a BSc degree would not fetch him any career worth its name.

When God calls, one has to respond
without a choice!

And so he protested. He did not fill out the application form. Instead, he just let it be in a corner of his study table. It was weeks later that his father found it, dusted it and filled it himself. The last date for the submission of application forms was already round the corner. He played an emotional card with Nitin,

“Son! I have allowed you to do whatever you like so far. Can’t you fulfill one wish of your father? I am not asking you to join this Institute; I just want you to apply and write the entrance test. Will you lose anything by just doing that much for your father?”

Nitin felt bad. He immediately took the filled application form and posted it to Puttaparthi. His father was happy and so was he because he knew in the inner recesses of his heart that he would never get a call letter - how could he if the last date for submission of application forms would elapse in the next couple of days? There was no way that the posted application could travel all the way to Puttaparthi from his current residence in Chandigarh in just 2 days. Nitin did not know then that when the Lord decides to enter one’s life, no force on earth can stop Him!

Within a week, he received a call letter. He had been selected to write the entrance examinations for BSc at the SSSIHL!

I came, I saw, I was conquered

Nitin and his father set out together for Puttaparthi. The bookings that they had got ensured that they would be arriving at Puttaparthi on the evening before the entrance examinations. However, a 10-hour delay (which was common in long-distance trains in India in those days) caused them to reach Dharmavaram on the day of the exams. Nitin had a bath on a platform at the Dharmavaram railway station itself before starting off for Puttaparthi in a rickety bus.

The duo landed right in front of the main entrance of Prasanthi Nilayam, at the temple of Lord Ganesha, the remover of obstacles. Praying to him and placing their luggage in the large accommodation shed (that existed next to the Ganesha temple those days), they rushed to the Institute campus. Nitin was just in time for the entrance exam! He wrote the exams and also attended the interview and group discussion. It would take nearly a week before the results would be announced.

NItin’s father had bookings to leave for Chandigarh. He was in for a pleasant surprise though. Nitin told him,

“Dad! You please go ahead, I shall stay on here, in this shed, till the results are announced.” Surprised but glad at this change of heart in Nitin, his father left. Nitin had no idea what made him speak thus .Today he knows that it was the case of Swami at work!

Swami was then at His Bangalore ashram, Brindavan in Whitefield, where He would stay till the end of summer in June. Nitin thought of seeing Him after the results were announced. Since he was free during the whole day, he volunteered to help in the ashram. He met and enlisted under a certain Mr. Wadegaonkar. Mr.Wadegaonkar was the unofficial head of the toughest service group of the ashram - the sanitation group. Inspired by him, Nitin eagerly and enthusiastically got involved in cleaning several septic tanks in Prasanthi Nilayam.

“Just a minute”, I interrupted his narrative, “you who did not want to even come to Puttaparthi, was now staying there and cleaning drains and septic tanks? How did you get this change of heart?”

“I don’t know what happened. But I just fell in love with the place and everything around. I loved sweating it out. I never felt that I was amidst excrement. I felt that I was surrounded by great love and divine peace! In fact, I was now sincerely hoping to get a seat at the SSSIHL.”

That is definitely some statement on the power of selfless service - it inspires, is self-sustaining and it transforms.

As was the practice those days, Nitin too accompanied all the volunteers of the sanitation group to Brindavan, Whitefield for blessings.

“We were told that Swami would give us padanamaskar. That did not happen. Something grander took place. As Swami walked out of His residence, I was entranced. I did not know what was happening to me but a surge of great joy and supreme peace welled within me. What I felt is simply indescribable. It was maddeningly beautiful and overwhelming. People say that when you see Swami, it is wonderful, when He sees you it is magical and if you get an interview it is absolute fulfillment. But that day, I felt fulfilled and complete in just seeing Him. I felt that I needed nothing else in life.”

Thus was Nitin conquered. It was love at first sight. And so, when Prof. Nanjundiah announced the names of the selected candidates in Swami’s presence, Nitin waited with bated breath. Sure enough, his name was called out too and he felt exulted. This, he felt, was the greatest achievement of his life - a blessing from the heavens above. He immediately dispatched a telegram to his father announcing the good news.

An unexpected death blow

On the 4th of June 1989, Nitin Kanade became a ‘Sai-student’. His happiness knew no bounds. He felt that he had never been happier in his life and looked forward to years of love with his Sai. But destiny had other plans.

It landed its first blow when the results of the XII grade Board Exams were announced. He had failed in Chemistry! This meant that he was ineligible to embark on any University course in India. He kept quiet about it but these things do not tend to remain quiet.

One day, in the middle of the class, he was summoned by the principal of the College, ‘Mahajan sir’. Mahajan sir told him that he could not be a student of the SSSIHL because he was not academically qualified to be one! The next day, Sri. K. Chakravarthi, the registrar of the Institute summoned him. Returning all the submitted certificates he told him to leave the institute and the hostel campus. There was nothing that could be done about it because those were the rules. The rules remain the same even to this day.

As a teary-eyed Nitin was wending his way out of the college building, the shutters of the exit door suddenly were closed. Nitin wondered what was happening and was told that Swami was driving on the road towards the hostel. He did not like any students loitering on the streets.

“The students must either be in college, in hostel or in the mandir. Why should they be loitering on streets?” He would often ask.

So, as a preventive measure, the college shutters would be pulled down especially when Swami went out for a drive.

As Nitin had been kicked out of college, Swami had come out and the shutters of the exit had been closed. Just like any of us, Nitin missed the symbolism in all these signs. He stood crying at the door, not realizing that Swami does not call based on qualifications. His call, in fact, is the greatest qualification in itself!

A lecturer of the college, Sai Giridhar, who knew this Truth about Swami and also knew Nitin’s plight, called him to a side. He told him,

“Don’t think all is lost. Swami is always there as the greatest refuge. He is going to the hostel to see the students’ music practice for Guru Poornima. You too go there. Things will change. You may not need to leave tomorrow...”

“But how do I go to the hostel when these doors are closed?” cried Nitin.

“Follow me”, said Giridhar sir, holding the ‘key’ to his problem.

Nitin sneaked out of the college as Giridhar sir took the risk to let him out. He ran to his hostel and scaled the wall since that gate was also locked. From there he went to the entrance of the hostel where he came face to face with the warden, Sri. Narayan Rao. And Sri.Narayan Rao’s face swelled in anger when he saw him. What was this student doing in the hostel when Swami had come there for witnessing the music practice? The fact that Nitin would be leaving and he could upset Swami with his ‘indiscipline’ (which could later affect the entire student community) only angered the warden even more.

“Stop there”, he commanded.

Was the warden Sri Narayana Rao (to Swami's immediate right) destined become an obstacle for Nitin (the
boy in spectacles to warden's right)? Read the second part to witness the unfolding of a drama divine.
Also seen to the extreme right of the photograph is Venkatachalam sir, the kitchen in-charge.

... to be continued in Part 2 located in the link below:

God does not call the qualified; God qualifies the called - Part 2

For all readers:

(If you enjoyed this and wish to subscribe to this blog, please go to the right hand side and choose the last 'box' which says subscribe. Another blog which I maintain with more than 200 articles on it is at http://aravindb1982.hubpages.com You may visit that at your leisure. If you wish to be added to my mailing list, please email me via this page with the subject "ADD ME TO MAILING LIST".

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Living in the present - sure way to avoid all sorrows

Taken from the animation movie - Kung Fu Panda

Past is past.

Future is uncertain.

Present not an ordinary present; it is the ‘omni’present.

- Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba

Not once or twice, I have heard my Swami state this many times. In fact, I am so accustomed to hearing it that even as He begins with the first line, I have already completed the rest in my mind. However rote learning and repetition of a phrase is no indicator of one’s understanding of it. And I must say that the power of the ‘present’ that God gifts us is overwhelmingly immense. This ‘present’, if unwrapped and lived to the fullest, has the ability to bestow great calm and peace. All the fears, worries, sorrows and the like result from us living either in the past or future. If we are able to forever ‘be’, then we are always in a state of peace. But then, as Baba beautifully puts it, being is lost in becoming. We seem to be perpetual time-travelers, restless to get out of the present and live in the past or future!

Let us understand this with one example of what anyone will consider as a tragedy - the loss of a beloved due to death.

Just imagine, if someone who is dear to you is suddenly hit by a moving car and is in death throes. What do you do? You immediately rush with first aid and summon an ambulance. Once the victim is in a doctor’s custody, you call the family and close friends. The doctor comes out and says that the patient is critical and is in need of a few pints of blood. You do your best to organize the necessary blood. The patient is put on external support and is stable, though critical. You now begin a two pronged approach - taking expert advice and opinions from different sources on one hand and praying for the recovery of your dear one on the other. Hours and days pass this way when, one day, the doctor says that its up; the patient is no more.

You reel from the shock and sit in a daze. Now, the tears well up. Without realizing it, you are already crying. The tears turn bitter and within moments you are sobbing. It is definitely a vulnerable and emotional moment.

Isn’t this a very plausible scenario that has been drawn up? Only the yogis will disagree! Yet, this very scenario, when analysed in the light of wisdom (which is unemotional), holds a great lesson for all about the power of the ‘present’ or the ‘Power of Now’ as Eckhart Tolle puts it.

When a tragedy strikes, we somehow are given all the intelligence, energies and resources needed to respond - call the ambulance, administer first aid, call the family. A tragedy transforms us into generators of energy and prayers. All this happens because, believe it or not, we are living in the present and responding to the ‘blows’ as they come. However, analysing logically in the above example of the patient’s death, a change comes over when the dear one passes away. The shock that strikes us stops us from living in the present.

Our minds immediately move into the past - recollecting the wonderful moments with the person. The mind also travels to the future - picturing the void that will exist with regards to the person. And, in no time, we get tears in our eyes. Sorrow is born the moment we stop living in the present and dwell in the past or future. I don’t know about the idle mind being a devil’s workshop but it sure is a time-traveller!

Let me share an incident, a bitter-sweet episode with my master and best-friend that taught me this lesson of living in the present.

A fool on April 1st?

Closely on the heels of the memorable trip to Hadshi and Mumbai, Bhagawan had agreed to bless the devotees from Delhi and Simla with His Divine visit. As is the case whenever Swami plans a trip, there was excitement among the staff and students to see who would get the Divine opportunity to accompany Him. I had got the privileged opportunity to travel along with Swami on the Hadshi trip. I was hoping to get a chance to accompany Him on this trip as well. It was the 1st of April and Swami, sitting on the dais after the darshan rounds, summoned the former vice-chancellor, Sri.S.V.Giri. Giri sir had a thick file with him which he began to show  Swami. Sitting on the steps of the main dais, I was sure that the file contained the profiles of ‘probables’, the candidates for the forthcoming Delhi-Simla trip. I could also see the photographs of a few staff and students as the papers in the file were flipped. My excitement was stirred and I began to crane my neck to see whether my profile would turn up and get selected.

I could see that I was not the only one with such thoughts and feelings. Almost everyone was eagerly waiting to see if they would be selected. As I was watching, Swami seemed to stop at one particular profile. He looked long at it and asked Giri sir about it. Covering his mouth, Giri sir said something into Swami’s ears (that was to ensure audibility over the Veda chanting going on rather than to have a secret conversation) after which Swami nodded. Swami then said something which thrilled me. I could not hear Him but I could clearly read from His lips that He asked,

“Photographer?”

Giri sir nodded. Swami also nodded. I felt a calm descend on me. I had been selected.

It just needed another 15 minutes for the calm to be shattered. Swami finished going through the file and moved into the interview room. He sent word for a few students and staff members to gather in the bhajan hall. This would be the group selected for the trip, I understood. As the different names were called out, I eagerly awaited mine to be called too. That, however, did not happen and a set of about 20-25 people walked into the bhajan hall. The pieces of my shattered calm began to prick and poke me.

“Oh My God! You are not there?”

“Did Giri sir forget to call you or was it somebody else that he discussed about with Swami? But then, who else could be ‘photographer’?”

“How wonderful the Hadshi trip was! And that was only for 6 days. This is a 10-day trip and you will be missing it...”

“Has Swami left you out on purpose? Is this a message for you?”

I had no idea about the number of thoughts that flooded me. I closed my eyes in an attempt to shut out the various scenarios that were forming before me. My external calm was in sharp contrast to the internal storm. The session concluded after the bhajans. As I was walking back, I could see the beaming faces of those that had been called in. That just made me burn from within. No, it wasn’t jealousy. Maybe, I wouldn’t have felt so bad had I not ‘heard’ Swami ask, “Photographer?”. But the fall from heights of expectations is a real hard one and that pained me.

I felt like I had been fooled by destiny on the 1st of April. I felt like a fool no doubt, but a like a fool with a hurting heart.

My heart longed to pray to Him to include me too in the list of 'probables' to Delhi-Simla. 

The ‘present’ lost in the past and future

I was feeling so bad that I decided to get up on my knees the next day during darshan and ask Swami to include me in the trip. I had never asked for anything worldly from Swami. My disappointment was such that I decided to make an exception this time. I was stopped in my foolish line of thinking by my colleague, C.G.Sai Prakash. He told me,

“Aravind, if Swami has decided not to choose you, will you impose yourself on Him like this? Won’t it be embarrassing for Him if you ask Him when He has decided not to take you?”

I was thinking, that it was easy for him to advise me that way as he was already in the select group. However, what he said was also sensible.

“I am not trying to embarrass Him. But what if there has been a mistake... It can be rectified when I bring it to His attention right?”

“Aravind! Mistake?! Hear yourself now. Do you think that the Lord makes mistakes? No. Keep a calm heart.”

How could I keep a calm heart? I was feeling so bad and left out.

“Okay, I will not get up and ask Him. But I will certainly write a letter about the same.” I concluded.

And that is exactly what I did - wrote a letter expressing my strong desire to accompany Him on the Delhi-Simla trip.

My diary entry for the 3rd of April reads like this.

In the evening, I had the letter where I had expressed my desire to accompany Him to Delhi. As He passed by me in the lines, He looked at me and kept looking at me. But then, He did not take my letter and I felt that maybe it was wrong to pressurise Him. So I put the letter back into my pocket. When He came on the stage, I made no efforts to even show the letter to Him. I sat doing bhajans with all enthusiasm. Swami looked at me once or twice and smiled. I felt  happy that He was smiling at me and I also felt that He was happy with me not trying to pressurize Him. He received Aarthi and left.

As I returned to my room, I saw the letter in my pocket. In an instant, all the joy that I was having after that beautiful darshan session was gone. My mind again travelled to the past and the future and, in no time, I was sad again. I sat brooding over what I would be missing in the future. My ‘being’ was surely being lost totally in ‘becoming’.

But these are retrospective thoughts. This wisdom did not dawn on me then and I spent the evening and night being morose. Anybody who had received what I had received that evening at darshan would be happy but not me. I was on my time-machine - reliving the past which I felt would never come to me again and visiting the future which I felt was one big void. The present, God’s gift to every person, was ‘sadly’ forgotten.

...to be concluded in next part which is at the link given below:

Accepting God's Presents and Presence

For all readers:

(If you enjoyed this and wish to subscribe to this blog, please go to the right hand side and choose the last 'box' which says subscribe. Another blog which I maintain with more than 200 articles on it is at http://aravindb1982.hubpages.com You may visit that at your leisure. If you wish to be added to my mailing list, please email me via this page with the subject "ADD ME TO MAILING LIST".

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Sometimes things go horribly wrong before going right - a message from Sri Sathya Sai Baba

Na Bruyath Sathyam Apriyam

“Sometimes, things have to go wrong before they can go right.”

It was a lunch table discussion that we were having when my brother, Amey Deshpande, made this statement in a vehement manner. The lunch-time talk had started off with the sad state of affairs in the world today - poverty, war, growing population, global warming and so on. The conversation had then progressed into the decline of moral values and the rapid rise of selfishness and greed before meandering into the bleak future that seemed to be greeting humanity. That was when Amey had made that flow-changing and mood-uplifting statement. He continued on that line of thought,

“I mean, don’t you fall off the bicycle many times before you learn to ride it? Don’t we drown in water, gulping down lungfuls of it before we can learn to swim? So too, when things go down, there are lessons to be learnt. We have to put in efforts and learn those lessons rather than crib and cry about everything going bad.”

That made so much sense and all of us at the table nodded. The naysayers and the prophets of doom seem to delight in painting a bleak picture of the world. While they say that they are simply stating the truth, there is an important hitch which they conveniently avoid. Truth can be stated in two ways -

1. In a manner that inspires and provokes action OR

2. In a manner that depresses and makes one feel hopeless.

The prophets of doom adopt the second way though they too secretly hope that they will be able to stir and rouse people/things to change. When, at the lunch table, it appeared as though the discussion was headed towards depression and hopelessness, Amey had brought about a change in the entire line of thinking. That in itself had made all of us feel so much better. I could not help but think about my dear Master and best friend, Bhagawan Sri Sathya Sai Baba, who always exhorts,

“Satyam Bruyath; Priyam Bruyath; Na Bruyath Satyam Apriyam”,

This means that one should always speak the Truth in a manner which is pleasing to everybody. And if the truth is only distasteful/unpleasant, it is better to adopt silence.

Amey had done just that. He had changed the ‘truthful’ discussion in a direction that would yield results rather than just depress and make the situation look hopeless for everyone. But more than that, he followed it with the narrative of a very intimate and personal experience with Swami (as Bhagawan Baba is reverentially and affectionately called). His narrative was filled with wisdom divine and lessons galore.

The pain that was necessary to remove another pain

It must be said that Amey became a ‘form boy’ almost as soon as he joined the Primary School in Puttaparthi. For those that are not familiar with the student-lingo, a ‘form boy’ is one who seems to receive a lot of attention and grace from Swami - like Swami speaks to him almost during every darshan session, gives him interviews along with the parents, ‘knows’ him by him name and so on. The period of ‘form’ could last a few hours, days, months or years. So, while those that are not in ‘form’ try to get into ‘form’, those in ‘form’ try to retain it as long as they can!

So, Amey was a ‘form boy.’ Ever since his ‘memorable’ first experience with Swami, he wanted to just be with Swami and dedicate his life to Him. And that seemed to be the precise direction in which he was headed. By the time he was in 8th grade, all the students and teachers knew him to be the ‘pet child’ of Swami. Amey had his appendicitis to thank for being instrumental in him becoming Swami’s pet!

Yes, you read it right! Towards the end of 1992, Amey had a severe tummy ache. That tummy ache soon was diagnosed as a swollen appendix infected with appendicitis. An operation to cut away the vestigial organ was suggested and Amey was scared. He got up and told Swami in the darshan lines that he had to undergo an operation. The moment Swami ‘got to know’ that he had appendicitis, the loving Divine mother in Him came to the fore. He gently patted him and assured him that all would be well. He called the doctors and told them that the best care must be taken of the boy.

Swami lovingly assures Amey that there is nothing to fear in an
appendicitis operation. 

The date for the operation was set a day after Amey’s birthday on December 24th. The operation went on very well and the doctors treated the case like they would do for a VVIP because Swami was enquiring about his health on a daily basis. All said and done, it was a simple appendicitis operation and by the 31st of December, Amey was hale and hearty, ready to be discharged. However, before he was discharged, a strange request came to him from the nurses and doctors of the Urology department in the Sri Sathya Sai Institute of Higher Medical Sciences - would he mind staying another day in the hospital and get discharged on the morning of the 1st of January?

The reason for this request was the fact that Swami would be visiting the hospital on the first day of 1993. The staff in the urology department rightly realized that if Amey was in the urology wards, Swami would definitely visit those wards! Amey agreed and Swami did indeed visit the Urology wing of the hospital. Thus, all the staff of the urology department enjoyed a special bonus of His darshan, sparshan and sambhashan (sight, touch and speech with Swami). The minute Swami left after His visit, Amey was discharged!

But that was not all. A white Mercedes car (registration number 8100) stood outside the hospital. Swami had sent His own car to pick up the boy from the hospital and take him back to the hostel! Needless to say, Amey was a hostel celebrity now and everyone spoke highly of his love, devotion and dedication to Swami without which it was simply not possible to enjoy the chances that he was enjoying. On the evening of New Year’s Day, Swami delivered a Divine Discourse in which He made Amey an example.

“See this appendicitis boy. He had to undergo an operation. He had to go through pain to overcome an existing pain.” (This exact sentence does not appear in the discourse link provided above because, as per the practice and policy, names and personal references are kept out unless they add to the message. Swami has Himself instructed that personal references are not important. The message is important.)

Swami also went on to advise the nurses on how they should take care of the patients and put caring for them even above having Swami’s darshan! Every nurse in the audience felt that Swami was speaking so because the ‘patient’ in His mind was Amey! That was the kind of love and grace that he was enjoying.

Stage serving and exhibition

The new year brought new chances for Amey. He was picked by Swami to be a part of the “stage-serving boys group” during the Annual Sports and Cultural Meet which was held on the 11th of January. That was another feather in his milestone-cap and Amey seemed to be on his way to smashing all previous ‘records’ of chances with the Lord at a tender age itself.

Amey being directed by Swami on how to go about serving the guests on stage - Sports Meet 1993.

Following the Sports Meet came another beautiful chance in the form of an exhibition which Swami attended. All the students of the school were asked to make ‘models’ which could be exhibited for Swami to see. Amey had made his exhibit behind which he had put in a lot of thought. Swami spent the maximum time at his exhibit when He came to see the 8th grade exhibition.

“Swami, this is the path to hell. The first part of the journey is filled with rose petals. That symbolizes easy gains, quick money and other such benefits which entice one to take the path. But later on, it is all suffering and misery symbolized by the thorns. The path to heaven is filled with thorns in the beginning, symbolizing the difficulties one faces when one is Truthful and Righteous. However, the later part of the journey is filled with rose petals to symbolize the peace and love that one receives by following the path. Swami’s picture in between the paths says that the Lord is the Sakshi Bhootam or the eternal witness.”

Amey explains his "heaven-hell" model as Swami listens in rapt attention. 

Swami smiled at the ‘wisdom’ of the little boy. He patted him lovingly on the head and expressed His appreciation. Once again, all the teachers and students were in admiration of Amey. In fact, after Swami left, Amey was also told to start preparing for another similar exhibition next year. Everyone felt that Amey’s model would once again, be the best.

These were how things stood when the final examinations for grade 8 were held and the annual summer vacation was declared. Looking forward to a happy vacation and a quick return therefrom to his dear Swami, Amey left for Muscat, to his parents. 8th grade had been a very fulfilling one for him. He had no idea of the storm that was about to hit him with the might of a devastating tsunami...

Things go horribly wrong

Amey was a hero at home, in his own country for everyone had heard of how close he was to Swami. He was looked up to even by the elders and was portrayed as a role model to all the youngsters. It was almost as if he had an invisible halo around his head! It was in these circumstances that Amey got into a rare argument with his father. The argument progressed and Amey was firmly asserting his point of view to his father. That was when the floodgates broke and Amey was caught horribly in the eye of a storm.

“SHUT UP NOW...THAT IS WHY THEY HAVE THROWN YOU OUT!” his father screamed at him. Amey did not understand one bit what his father was telling him. And his father was now in tears!

“Do you know, you have been expelled from Swami’s school?” he asked amid sobs.

Amey could simply not believe his ears. What was his father talking about? He was the ideal student, Swami’s favorite and the gem of his class. How could he be expelled?

“This is the letter that I have received from the principal. It says that I am required to go to Puttaparthi to collect your transfer certificate. You have been expelled because of three reasons:

1. Excessive and constant talk.

2. Unwanted contacts and friendship.

3. Medical problems.

You will not be going back to Puttaparthi! You have been thrown out of school. This has never happened to anyone in our family. Your mother and me have been looking out for good schools in the vicinity...”

Amey was not listening any more. Hot tears were streaming down his cheeks. He was in an absolute shock and did not know what to do or how to respond. Nobody came forward to hug him or console him because apparently, everyone was distraught. In one moment, his whole world had turned topsy turvy and from a hero, he had become a loser, a blotch in the family name.

“That was the beginning of the things going wrong that I told about”, said Amey.

“The beginning?”, I asked incredulously, “you mean to say that things went more wrong?”

“You bet”, said Amey, “I seemed to pummel down into a bottomless pit.”

“And yet, today you are here, where you are!”, I said encouragingly, ”how did that happen?”

“That is what I said in the beginning, that at times things have to go wrong before they can go right. In retrospect, I am grateful to Swami for all the beautiful memories and even for what seemed as rude shocks. The point is, just because things seem to be going wrong, it doesn’t mean that everything is lost. Going wrong is very much part of the Masterplan of things going right - like the failures which are considered as stepping stones for success. When I came to know that I was kicked out of school, I once again remembered Swami's statement during the New Year's Day discourse - that one pin is needed to weed out another bigger pain. I just hoped that this condition too would be the pain that is removing some greater pain that i would otherwise have to undergo."

Even as I prepared myself to hear the next part of his riveting story, I was lost in thoughts about the profundity of what Amey had just said.


...to be continued in an exciting second part. Read it at Moving away from God to get closer to Him.

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